


She’s Not You

by Avery9902



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Breakup/makeup, Derek Uses His Words, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure Stiles Stilinski, Lydia saves the day, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Derek Hale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:22:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24172771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avery9902/pseuds/Avery9902
Summary: Derek would rather be anywhere but here.  He would never miss the sheriff and Melissa’s wedding but god seeing him stings.
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Comments: 8
Kudos: 366





	She’s Not You

Derek would rather be anywhere but here. He would never miss the Sheriff and Melissa’s wedding, but god seeing him stings. 

It was only a couple months ago that Stiles walked in to Derek’s apartment to tell him he wasn’t interested anymore. It was two weeks before Stiles was leaving for college in the fall and Derek had planned to spend every minute of it with him. 

When he first walked in, reeking of pain he knew something was wrong. He never expected that though. He didn’t know he was even capable of feeling that hurt again. He was blindsided. 

He kept going for the pack though. He wasn’t about to fall off the deep end like he had before, he had responsibilities now. So he continued on, like every time someone mentioned Stiles name his knees didn’t buckle. He pretending like when Stiles responded in the pack group chat that it didn’t make his heart lurch. He put on a fake smile when he saw the sheriff around town. He kept telling himself this would pass, he would be okay. But here he is sitting at his table in the corner, with the woman he stupidly decided to ask to come with him. 

He ran into her at the grocery store a week and a half after Stiles left for school. Derek’s not going to lie and say that he doesn’t get approached by a lot of different people based on his appearance, but for reasons that are pretty obvious to him and others who know Derek’s situation, he actually gave her the time of day. 

She’s brunette, tall and lanky, with a slightly upturned nose and familiar moles peppering her pale skin. Derek admits to himself that he might have a problem after he willingly gave her his number. 

She’s nothing like Stiles. She’s too quiet and reserved. He’s actually surprised she made the effort of speaking to him. Derek’s not trying to insult the girl or anything but she’s just lack luster when compared to what he had lost. She’s smart but not extremely intelligent, and she’s empathetic but not dangerously loyal. She doesn’t ramble about random topics for half an hour, and she doesn’t have witty sarcastic comebacks at the ready. 

She just isn’t him. 

He isn’t genuinely interested in her. He knows it wrong but he’s just trying to fill the hole that has been there for months since Stiles left him without an explanation. Things had been going so well. He and Stiles were taking things slow after Stiles ended up admitting his feelings. 

He didn’t know what happened. What he did wrong. Stiles never gave him the opportunity to ask. 

Derek doesn’t feel too bad about leading her on though. She’s interested in Derek but not for the right reasons and he knows that. She doesn’t know his past, and who he really is. If she did, she would run. That’s okay though because he’s planning on never speaking to her again after this. He’s realized the thought of being physical with anyone that’s not Stiles, even just kissing, makes him sick to his stomach. So it’s not really fair of him to keep wasting her time when he isn’t sure he’s ever going be able to overcome that. 

He hadn’t really seen Stiles around since the ceremony, but Derek was glad. It made the whole ordeal easier to stomach. They had been just sitting at the table talking for the past hour of the reception when Lydia approached, her heels loudly clicking on the linoleum. 

“Deeeeerek... long time no see.” Lydia greeted enthusiastically, an underlying tone of aggression. 

“Hey Lydia, something wrong?” Derek asked, knowing if he didn’t, she was going to tell him anyway. 

“Can I.... talk to you in private for a moment?” She asked, gesturing to the empty corner by the restrooms. 

He hesitated, but in the end stood wordlessly. There was no point in arguing with Lydia Martin. You won’t win. 

As soon as they were out of earshot, well earshot of the humans of course, Lydia let the rage she was hiding loose. 

“Why the actual fuck would you bring someone here?” Her mouth was set in a hard line and she was tapping her foot as if it was the only thing holding her back from beating the shit out of him. 

He didn’t really know how to answer, he wasn’t sure either. 

“I thought we were supposed to bring plus ones....” He trailed off. 

She scoffed, “OPTIONAL PLUS ONES DEREK. Are you trying to hurt Stiles? If that’s the case, you and your little friend can go.”

“NO-No why would it hurt Stiles? Is he okay?” Derek suddenly felt sick at the thought of causing the boy distress. 

“Is he oka- Derek did you really think seeing you with someone else wouldn’t effect him?” She asked incredulously. 

“I didn’t realize... I-I didn’t think..”

“Yeah that’s thing, you didn’t think. I’ve had to calm Stiles down like 3 times in the past hour. This is his DAD’S wedding and he should be able to focus on being happy for him. Not the fact that you’re flaunting a female replica of him around. Don’t think other people haven’t noticed.” She scolded. 

He shrunk in on himself. He may be the alpha but her tone was incredibly intimidating. He also really hated that he had upset Stiles. He didn’t think that it would be a problem, Stiles was the one who broke it off with him after all. 

“Lydia, he broke up with me. I had no idea he’d care.” 

She laughed humorlessly, “By broke it off, what do you mean? Because Stiles told me the reason you weren’t speaking anymore was because he was tired of being your secret play thing. I don’t think he thought there was anything to break.”

Derek’s whole world shifted on its axis. Secret play thing? Nothing to break?

“I don’t-that’s not... not to me.”

She stared at him, analyzing, while he took in the new information. He thought back to that day when Stiles had told him he was done. He did smell extremely upset and his heart was beating wildly, but Derek chalked that up to being afraid of his reaction and the negative impact it could’ve had on the pack. He never thought it might be because Stiles didn’t want to end things. He didn’t think it was because Stiles thought he was a toy. 

Stiles had been asking him about telling his dad and coming clean to the pack. The pack already knew. They smelled the intermingling scents, and they knew the reaction that the pair had to each others presence. Derek was afraid to tell the Sheriff about it. Sure they hadn’t done anything wrong. Just the occasional make out session and the cuddling on Derek’s couch, but Derek was never going to go any farther than that without talking to the sheriff. He was scared that Stiles wouldn’t be allowed around the pack if his dad’s reaction to Derek’s feelings were negative. 

He didn’t mean to make Stiles feel- fuck he made Stiles feel used. It all made sense now. The reason his scent would sour when Derek would shy away from him around the pack. When Derek would ignore him in front of his dad. He was being cruel without even realizing. 

“I need to-”

“Yeah you should go talk to him. Seems like there’s been a misunderstanding here. But just know if you fuck this up, I don’t care that you are our alpha I will personally haul your furry ass out of here.” With that Lydia was gone, disappearing into the crowd. 

Derek took a deep breath trying to pick out Stiles. He followed his nose to the hallway by the entrance. Stiles was leaning against a wall staring at his phone, nervously chewing on his fingernails. 

He smelled like hurt, anxiety, fear, and the sweat of embarrassment all rolled in to one and it made Derek’s heart drop. He let out an involuntary wolffish whine which made Stiles look up. 

When their eyes met you could cut the tension with a knife. Derek quickly scanned Stiles face which was damp, eyes red and puffy. He curled in on himself almost as if shielding himself from whatever Derek came to say. With his carefully constructed wall of sarcasm and deflection completely gone Derek now saw how wrecked he was and it killed him. 

“Stiles I-” Derek started but was quickly interrupted. 

“Hey Derek. What’s up?” It’s like his voice startled Stiles out of whatever stupor he was in and reactivated his guard. He quickly wiped up all the tears from his face and tried to hide the fact that his eyes were red by training them on the ground.

“Lydia talked to me.”

Stiles heart lurched at that. 

He laughed emptily, “I told her not to do that listen- j-just ignore her. She means well but she doesn’t really understand what i-“

“No actually I think she’s the only one that understands.”

Stiles looked up at that and cocked his head to the side questioningly, “what did she say to you?”

Derek wanted so badly to reach out to him, “she just clarified some things for me.”

Silence for a moment. 

“You’re gonna have to be more specific for me Der.”

That nickname still does something to him. 

He took a deep breath walking a few steps forward, “I think I need to explain some things. It’s still up to you how we proceed from here but you need all the facts and so far you’ve only had your own mind filling in the blanks.”

Stiles instantly let out a wave of fear that slapped Derek in the face, and chuckled nervously.

“Haha what do you know? Sourwolf actually can speak more that 2 syllables”

“Stiles, don’t be scared okay.... it’s me.”

Stiles just kinda stared at him for a second before nodding. 

“When you came to me asking to go back to just friends I... I was devastated. I don’t think I’ve ever been that wrecked n-not since Kate.”

He paused as guilt flooded the room. 

“But I respected your decision. If that was what you wanted I was going to keep my distance and lick my wounds. However, I think what I thought was the reason and the actual reason are completely different. Lydia told me some things that I really don’t want to believe are true but I’m afraid they are.”

Stiles tenseness told him everything he needed to know, but he still wanted to ask. 

“Did you really think you were just some toy to me?”

The reaction was minor but Derek still caught it. He flinched at his own words being thrown back at him out of Derek’s mouth. Almost as if they were a confirmation. 

He quickly recovered his ability to speak though, “W-we don’t have to do this. This isn’t- I didn’t mean for this.”

Derek took another step forward, Stiles leaning further into the wall trying to get more distance. 

“I think we do.”

He was frozen in fear now, heart erratic and barely breathing. 

“You really think I would do that to you?”

The guilt came back and he stumbled over his words, “N-no Derek it’s not that I just.... you didn’t want to be seen together and I- I didn’t know if that meant you were I don’t know... ashamed or whatever. Because you’re you and I’m me” he gestured to himself in a slightly disgusted way, “but it doesn’t matter! You’re a g-good guy! I knew that you wouldn’t want to hurt me s-so I gave you an out, ya know? Figured you-” he laughed self deprecatingly, “you wanted to see how it would go and you j-just weren’t feeling it anymore.”

After that was all out his shoulders sagged in defeat and the shame just rolled off of him. Derek was speechless. He fucked up more than he though. Stiles genuinely thought he was ashamed of him. He was stupid in thinking Stiles leaving was the worst he could feel, this was it. Like a knife to the gut continually being twisted, and it was all his fault. 

Once he regained a semblance of composure he took another step towards Stiles.

“I’m so sorry Stiles.”

Stiles face shot up in shock at the apology. Derek rarely apologizes. But Stiles next reaction isn’t what he expected, he let out this gut wrenching yet quiet noise of acceptance but tried to cover it with a laugh. 

“No h-hard feelings dude. It happens, you can go back to your table now I’m sure she’s waiting f-for you.”

Stiles moved to step away and Derek shot out an arm to block him, “No wait, that’s not what I’m apologizing for. Now it’s my turn to explain.”

Stiles eyes were filled with unshed tears and he was so tense Derek just wanted to pull him in. But it would have to wait. 

“I’m not apologizing because I don’t want you. Stiles I’ve wanted you from the moment your smug ass walked into the preserve looking for Scott’s inhaler. I’ve wanted you since you almost cut of my arm at Deaton’s. I’ve loved you since you held me up for hours in that pool.”

Derek caught a whiff of hope so he continued. 

“You’re undeniable brave, and unbelievable intelligent, and the fact that you think so lowly of yourself that I would be ashamed of you is baffling. I wasn’t upfront about our relationship, which yes it was a relationship, because I was afraid that if your dad found out you wouldn’t be allowed to be pack anymore. I didn’t want to lose you. I was so caught up in my fear that I lost you anyway and I’m sorry Stiles. I’m so fucking sorry for how careless and cruel I was. I didn’t mean any of it.”

The silence was deafening. 

“Say something.” Derek’s practically begged. 

“I-I just... you always gave an eye roll or grunted when I asked you what we w-were I don’t...”

Derek nodded his head in agreement, “I’m not good with my words. But it’s obvious I need to work on it. You will not continue to feel this way no matter how hard it is for me to get over my issues. You deserve better so we will work on it.”

The scent of hope was growing stronger by the second.

“But what about her-”

“We are not together. I met her at the grocery store and she reminded me of you. But she’s not. Nothing has happened between us.” Derek tried to instantly squash any argument Stiles had planned. 

The tears finally started to fall but Derek wasn’t so sure it was out of sadness, smelled more like relief. Stiles heart rate was more steady and his breathing less ragged. 

He gasped as if he suddenly remembered something important. 

“You love me?” He asked fearfully. 

“I love you.” Derek responded without any hesitation, there was no time for misunderstandings right now. 

It was like weeks of tension left his body in that moment, he sagged in exhaustion. The tears flowed freely now and he buried his face in his hands. Derek took this opportunity to embrace him for the first time in months and they both clung to each other. 

“I love you too.” He chocked out. 

They stayed like that for a while. Locked in each other’s arms. Derek eventually tried to pull away, knowing he had a few things to take care of before he could take Stiles home, but when he tried there was resistance. 

“W-wait. D-don’t.” Stiles gripped tighter. 

Derek pulled his face up so he could look him in the eyes, “I’m going to tell Grace that I’m going to have to call her a cab. I’m also going to tell Scott you’re coming with me tonight instead of staying with him, the party is winding down anyways. Do you want to come with me?” 

“Yes please” he let out quietly. 

“Okay just wait right here I’ll be right back.” Derek gently cupped Stiles face and gave him the gentlest peck and turned to get everything over with as soon as possible so he could get back to him. 

Later that night when Derek and Stiles were curled up on the couch watching marvel movies, Derek asked him if they could tell his dad the next day. Stiles broke out in a grin and nodded. Derek reveled in the fact that Stiles looked so genuinely pleased, and vowed to himself to keep that look on his face forever.


End file.
